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Post by RogueWarrior1957 on Apr 3, 2008 15:37:42 GMT 12.75
Well, he brought that camel to a screechin' halt (screeching sound) In the rear of Fatima's tent Jumped off Clyde, snuck around the corner And into the tent he went. There he saw Fatima layin' on a zebra skin rug With [Spoken in falsetto] "Rings on her fingers and bells on her toes and a bone in her nose ho, ho."
There she was, friends, lyin' there in all her radiant beauty, eating on a raisin, grape, apricot, pomegranate, bowl of chittlin's, two bananas, three Hershey bars, sipping on a RC co-cola listenin' to her transistor, watchin' the Grand Ole Opry on the tube, readin' a Mad magazine while she sung, "Does your chewing gum lose it's flavor?" Yeah, Ahab walked up to her and he say, (imitate Arabic speech), which is Arabic for "Let's twist again like we did last summer, baby.!!" Ha, ha, ha!! You know what I mean! Whew! She looked up at him from off the rug, give him one of them sly looks,
She said (suggestive giggles, then outright laughter) "Crazy, crazy, crazy baby!"
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Post by Paws on Apr 3, 2008 21:02:24 GMT 12.75
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Post by Bro. Freddie on Apr 3, 2008 21:11:28 GMT 12.75
Well, he brought that camel to a screechin' halt (screeching sound) In the rear of Fatima's tent Jumped off Clyde, snuck around the corner And into the tent he went. There he saw Fatima layin' on a zebra skin rug With [Spoken in falsetto] "Rings on her fingers and bells on her toes and a bone in her nose ho, ho." There she was, friends, lyin' there in all her radiant beauty, eating on a raisin, grape, apricot, pomegranate, bowl of chittlin's, two bananas, three Hershey bars, sipping on a RC co-cola listenin' to her transistor, watchin' the Grand Ole Opry on the tube, readin' a Mad magazine while she sung, "Does your chewing gum lose it's flavor?" Yeah, Ahab walked up to her and he say, (imitate Arabic speech), which is Arabic for "Let's twist again like we did last summer, baby.!!" Ha, ha, ha!! You know what I mean! Whew! She looked up at him from off the rug, give him one of them sly looks, She said (suggestive giggles, then outright laughter) "Crazy, crazy, crazy baby!" Thats Ahab the Arab, a song made famous by Ray Stevens, one of the BEST entertainers of all time.
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Post by Toby Benoit on Apr 4, 2008 9:27:41 GMT 12.75
"Ray Stevens, one of the BEST entertainers of all time." Careful Preacher...folks'll think yer from arkysaw or sumptin! "Just remember Pastor, that Kotex string there just might be a fuse!" Oh damn, Phil. I think I just peed my pants!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Post by RogueWarrior1957 on Jun 17, 2008 17:07:26 GMT 12.75
Don't try this at home!
Well, I guess I'm all set to get those deck screws removed from my ankle about noon on Wednesday. Could have saved a lot of money and frustration with an x-acto knife and my Black & Decker drill...but everyone is afraid I would screw up (little pun intended).
I took the afternoon off from work to get all the preliminary bullcrap done before having the surgery Wednesday. Of course that entailed going to the doctor's office, going to the day surgery center, then the pre-op nurse made me go over to diagnostic for blood work and an EKG. Never had an EKG before, so I was pretty apprehensive about that. Well, there wasn't a treadmill from hell like I was expecting, and it didn't shock me, and other than having to endure about 15 minutes of having wires stuck all over my chest (and a few missing patches of fur) it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. And the fur will grow back...eventually...guess I'll look moth-eaten in the meantime. Guess I can tell people it's the latest fad....Apache fur...LOL! Still think the EKG was totally unnecessary, but I suppose they have to pay for all that fancy hardware. Impressed me about like getting a colonoscopy for a tonsilectomy. Guess I do have a heart after all...didn't find a message on my answering machine saying otherwise so far.
The surgery should be pretty cut and dried, but of course they always have to tell you about all the crap that can go wrong. I was like, "Hey, they're just taking a couple of deck screws out of my ankle...I'm not having a fricking triple bypass!" Yes, I am kinda grumpy with the medical people because they always treat you like you are stupid. And it is kinda scary when they tell you stuff like, "Your heart could stop and you could die, gringo!" Nah, I'm coloring it up a little, but they do warn you about all the possible things that could go wrong to get them out of the liability part. Even if it did stop, it would be preferable to putting up with that crap in my ankle from now on. And I've had a near death experience before when I was in that car wreck. If I lived though that, I can live through anything.
Will post again when it is all over...
Bill J. -aka- Rogue "Never take someone for granted Hold every person close to your heart Because you might wake up one day And realize that you've lost a diamond While you were too busy collecting stones."
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Post by Paws on Jun 18, 2008 22:51:37 GMT 12.75
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Post by RogueWarrior1957 on Jun 19, 2008 11:47:54 GMT 12.75
Unscrewed!!! Yippee!!!
It's alive....it's alive!!! (to borrow a line from "Young Frankenstein")
Just wanted to drop you a note and tell ya that I survived! We had a little more excitement than anticipated cause when he pulled one of the screws out, the washer fell back in there and they had to go on a scavenger hunt. Good news is all the hardware is out of there, and soon as they took it out the deep ache in the bone went away. The incision kinda burns like when you have a cut and get a little bit of salt in it...but not real bad. I didn't tell them, but their local anesthesia never got it to the point of not being able to feel what they were doing to a certain extend, and a couple of times I had to grit my teeth...especially when he was hunting for that washer and then when they stapled everything back up. Keeping 'er elevated and an ice pack on 'er much as possible.
I hadn't eaten since about 8:30 last night...wasn't supposed to even drink anything...so I was thirst, hungry, and grumpy as a bear. Soon as they cut me loose, I had Sis make a beeline for Sonic and I devoured a Island Fire Burger and Tater Tots along with a diet coke. Those are good burgers...two patties of beef, smoked cheddar, bacon strips and a mild habernero sauce...not too hot, but just tangy enough to be good.
I don't know a whole lot of news...just wanted to let you know I'm gonna be alright. In fact I feel purdy good other than a slight burning sensation where the incision is. Been laying out on the porch soaking up the sun with my foot elevated in the shade with an ice pack on it. I have lilac bushes around the front of the house so I can lay out there and enjoy without being the object of interest by passers by. In fact if one was so a mind, they could get snot-slinging, commode hugging drunk out there and no one would know the difference.
It felt good to know that I had friends who were sending good thoughts and saying a little prayer for me. Thank you!!!
-Bill-
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Post by Bro. Freddie on Jun 19, 2008 12:02:58 GMT 12.75
Glad to hear that you are minus your screws Rogie. Prayers were answered today for your operation. Now, stay off it and let it heal so you can get on that big ole Harley.
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Post by Paws on Jun 19, 2008 23:41:53 GMT 12.75
:-/Rogie for the update! Sure glad everything is working right. No doubt that God is faithful and He said "Ask, and it shall be granted!" (Or something close to that.) Glad we got Pastor Freddie in there pitchin' for us too cause I'm pretty sure he has God's ear even if he can't hold a job! (Love you Pastor!)
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Post by Snake Eyes on Jun 20, 2008 0:47:48 GMT 12.75
Rogue, Great to hear you are doing well..I have learned that there are times, it is best to listen to the Dr. But, I have at times,learned that my body,on occasion knows more about me than my Dr.So if I feel good,sometimes I ignore the Dr. An example,and I would never advise this to anyone!!I had back surgery for 2 crushed disc in my lower back,2 years ago.Dr. told me and my wife,I would be off work for 6 to 8 months.Went back to work after 3 months with no ill effects. Sometimes I think Drs will tell you stuff just to cover their rear end,and I understand that full well. I did a workout for my Dr that took 1/2 hour with no problems,and went back to work a week later! Listen to your Dr,but in some cases listen to your body. snake-eyes IMHO
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Post by Bro. Freddie on Jun 20, 2008 12:08:09 GMT 12.75
Glad we got Pastor Freddie in there pitchin' for us too cause I'm pretty sure he has God's ear even if he can't hold a job! (Love you Pastor!) Father, We read in your wonderful Word where at one time one of your prophets was visiting a town, and some children came out and made fun of him because of his lack of hair. We read of your judgment of these children, which was 2 she bears that came out of the woods and devoured the children. Father, we ask that you not bring this judgment upon Phil, because he didn't know no better. Also cause he would cause the bears to have indigestion. Father forgive him of this sin and also forgive Toby of the sins we all know he has willingly committed. In your blessed name we pray, AMEN!
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Post by Paws on Jun 20, 2008 13:32:10 GMT 12.75
Look Tobey; we been pr eyed on!
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Post by Toby Benoit on Jun 20, 2008 14:25:12 GMT 12.75
Hey there! I just been poached by a preacher! I hear tell that a feller's s'posed to turn the other cheek, but seems like everytime i turn that cheek, somebody up and smacks me in the other one! Doggone Hillbilly preacher; prolly just mad cause his snakes got away! Glad you're up and around there Roguey. Now, why do I naturally get a vision of you doing a River Dance out of the doctors office? Kinda like one of them dancing grizzlies they used to train for the Russian circus...but with a handle bar mustache, lolol! ;D
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Post by Mars on Jun 21, 2008 2:23:02 GMT 12.75
His screw is not only loose it done came out! And you'ens need it!
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Post by RogueWarrior1957 on Jun 21, 2008 5:14:23 GMT 12.75
Here's a picture of part of my hardware collection: Suggestion was made that I make a windchime out of all the pieces of orthopedic steel I've collected over the years. A dime is in the photo for size reference. Trust me...those beggars feel much better in that package than they did in my ankle! -Rogue-
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Post by Toby Benoit on Jun 24, 2008 13:29:35 GMT 12.75
Anybody wanna start a pool on how long it'll ytake this bog cluts to head back to the ER?
I'll start off with a dollar on two and a half months. Anybody else want in? ;D
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Post by RogueWarrior1957 on Jun 25, 2008 17:42:03 GMT 12.75
Toby, Toby, Toby...don't know what I'm gonna do with ya! Just because I usually make an annual pilgrimage to the ER is no reason to think that I'm clutzy! I usually only cut myself with surgical precision...or butt my head against something causing a need for sutures...but I'm not clutzy....Sheesh! ;D And laying bets...none the less! That's baaad! -Rogue-
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Post by Paws on Jun 25, 2008 23:54:28 GMT 12.75
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Post by Toby Benoit on Jun 26, 2008 7:48:24 GMT 12.75
I'm sorry Rogiey, I reckon Clutzy ain't the word for ya. But what word does? How do ya describe a bull in the china shop?
Poor rascal, ya know I wouldn't wish a new set of sutures on ya, but just expecting the inevitable, lol. ;D ;D ;D
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Post by Paws on Jun 26, 2008 13:46:27 GMT 12.75
I'm sorry Rogiey, I reckon Clutzy ain't the word for ya. But what word does? How do ya describe a bull in the china shop? Poor rascal, ya know I wouldn't wish a new set of sutures on ya, but just expecting the inevitable, lol. ;D ;D ;D Awwww it's the scars that make the biker!
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