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Post by RogueWarrior1957 on Jan 20, 2006 18:45:17 GMT 12.75
Here's a poem that got me kicked out of English Lit class in high-school:
A Little Bird
I woke early one morning, the earth lay cool and still
When suddenly a tiny bird perched on my window sill
He sang a song so lovely, so careful, and so bright
That slowly all my troubles began to slip into the night.
He sang of far off places, of laughter, and of fun
It seemed his very trilling brought up the morning sun.
I stirred beneath the covers, crept slowly out of bed.
Then gently shut window and crushed his f*cking head.
I'm not a morning person. ;D
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Post by Paws on Jan 21, 2006 3:04:54 GMT 12.75
LMAO!! ;D Now Bill that ain't dumb at all! ;D
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Post by Toby Benoit on Jan 21, 2006 18:04:21 GMT 12.75
Good one Bill!
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Post by Paws on Jan 25, 2006 13:44:01 GMT 12.75
Possibly telling Bruce that I thought we could make our own gun powder! More to follow!
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Post by Toby Benoit on Jan 31, 2006 17:28:38 GMT 12.75
Paws, if that "experiment" should go awry, can have your great coat?
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Post by Brikatw on Feb 1, 2006 10:32:55 GMT 12.75
DIBS ON HIS CAMPER!!!! ;D Chester banks too ;D
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Post by OLKoot on Feb 2, 2006 8:18:05 GMT 12.75
Give me the cast iron....all of it!!! ;D
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Post by Paws on Feb 13, 2006 3:08:17 GMT 12.75
You guys got it! ;D Man I was reading this for the umpteenth time and got the giggles so bad!!! ;D There is just something about electricity. Got to tell on my kid. She was maybe six or seven at the time. I''m watching T.V. and out of the dining room comes this Yaoooooowwwwww!! I get up walk in and there is Maria sitting facing the wall near an outlet with a stupid look on her face and a widely spread hair pin in her hand. She said nothing, I said nothing. The subject was never mentioned again; except when I sneaked on outside and bust a gut laughing! ;D
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Post by whitetailhunter1 on Sept 12, 2006 5:40:15 GMT 12.75
??? I will have to think on this for some time . I know Iwill have something to add to this. see you later.
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Post by Brikatw on Sept 12, 2006 8:40:40 GMT 12.75
Reminds me of YEARS ago when Chris was still a baby almost. He was just getting started on potty training. We were out in our yard at Homestead AFB, Fl. THERE I WAS being a good base houseing tenent and keeping up on the yard work. I had the weedeater going and was buzzing away the edges the mower missed when all of a sudden I hear the boy start to screaming and the weedeater went to acting weird. ???I dropped the weedeater and ran around the corner to see a little boy, pants down around his ankles, holding his thingamabob in both hands and jumping up and down screaming. There was also a wet spot on the wall that ran down across the outlet and a puddle that had formed there in the barefoot prints of the now dancing little boy. Seems, Ground fault outlets were not required in government housings outdoor outlets. Took him to th e ER and they said he was fine, just got the cheapest thrill of his life. To top it all off, when Kathy came to see what happened, he looked up at her with those big sad eyes (the same look Phil gives Sue) and said....."Kiss it Mommy" ;D ;D ;D
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Post by Paws on Sept 12, 2006 16:47:14 GMT 12.75
LOL!! They just don't get no better than those "man and 'lectric" stories! ;D I just read Rich's "Lick the calculator wire" story for the umpteenth time and I can't breath! Lord that is the funniest thing. ;D
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Post by gsoflittledove on Sept 17, 2006 15:55:05 GMT 12.75
Man yall have some good ones Back in my AF days, I was on a double date, (in the Texas Panhandle) My Buddy who was driving, Pulled over and ran to the edge of a milo fielf to releive himself. The screeme drew our attition, but the sparks comming off his shoes was the highlight, and him screming IIIICCCCAAAANNNNTTTTSSSTTTOOOOPPPP He had got into an Electric Fence The boy passed out And I rember his date saying I'm not gonna KISS THAT ;D ;D Bill
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Post by Paws on Sept 18, 2006 1:26:48 GMT 12.75
No no; like this;
[glow=yellow,6,600]"IIIICCCCAAAANNNNTTTTSSSTTTOOOOPPPP!"[/size][/i] [/color] [/glow]
See, now that's an electric fence! ;D (Good one there.) ;D
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Post by Paws on Sept 20, 2006 23:46:21 GMT 12.75
I will have to think on this for some time . I know Iwill have something to add to this. see you later. Well come on now we're waiting
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Post by gsoflittledove on Sept 22, 2006 15:22:52 GMT 12.75
A lot of years ago Me and two buddies was on a late Spring Fishing overnighter, down on the local creek. We had this one sethook that kelp loosing its' bate, Well about good dark thirty, we caught the culpert ;D a old logerhead turtle Sometime later (about a case and a half) We came up wirh a plan to get even with that old boy. We pulles a Con. Jackson We dosed that old boy with Gasalene ;D then we set the pushwater OFF ;D WELL he rose up about 10 inches and took off so dang fast WE could not catch HIM Well about a hunderd yds or so he found the creek Our problun had just begun there was a hunderd yds FIRE Well I tell you that old turtle relly put it to us We fought fire for the next two hrs or so. So "Dont set turtles a fire cose they sure can out run you
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Post by Brikatw on Sept 30, 2006 16:20:40 GMT 12.75
SON!!! The only heat a Loggerhead needs is fronm the pot and tabasco. MMMMMM good eats my boy.
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Post by othmar on Sept 30, 2006 18:15:55 GMT 12.75
I just wanted to change a light bulb. No big deal. Unscrew the old one and in with the new one. Forgot only a little fact. If old light bulb is broken turn off the main electric supply. Do not attempt to screw the broken part out of the socket with a cheap pair of pliers. Next thing I know, was me sitting on the ground across the room, fingers feeling like on fire and having somebody stomping on them at the same time.
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Post by Toby Benoit on Oct 1, 2006 12:26:48 GMT 12.75
Ain't nothing funnier than someone else having a brain fart while playing with electricity! ;D
Ben Franklin would be so proud! ;D ;D ;D
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Post by Brikatw on Oct 3, 2006 6:23:48 GMT 12.75
Everytime I get "ZAPPED" I gotta get ready to do it again on purpose. Just in case you know......
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Post by Paws on Oct 8, 2006 2:30:37 GMT 12.75
I love them [glow=red,9,900]"ZAAAAAP"[/i][/glow] stories! My Electricity I teacher in High School always would takes his finger and wet it with his tongue then touch an open wire, socket, whatever "real easy" to check it. He got bit a bunch! Othmar next time you got to pull a busted bulb, after you turn the switch off; cut a potato in half and jam it over the annode and broken glass to twist it out. Sometimes a broom handle jamed into the mogule will work also.
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